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Pardon me, but my straight privilege is showing

Author’s Note:
I’m going to do something I try to never do when I write: I’m going to preface this article. I wouldn’t usually, but the material is personal and incomplete and may seem a bit rambling and disconnected. However, I suspect that I’m not alone in the questions and conclusions that I’m mulling over, so please bear with me and hopefully there’s a kernel or two that resonates or contributes to a bigger conversation. 

When I set out to watch Fetish Fvckdolls 2 (which if you haven’t watched it, I’d encourage you to do so at your earliest convenience) I wasn't expecting it to be a big deal. I’ve blogged here before about how watching porn that’s “not your usual taste” or incongruent with your own desires is interesting and can be enlightening. I was pretty sure that a collaboration by queer and trans performers like Fetish Fvckdolls 2 would be just that: interesting, but not my cup of tea. 

Why? Well, I’m a straight-identifying, dominant-leaning cisgender woman who almost exclusively watches gay male chastity porn. Specific? Yup. And really kind of a world away from transfemme submission, which is the overarching  main theme running through the four vignettes in Fetish Fvckdolls 2. You can see then how I might have thought that my interest in the film would be purely academic. Interestingly, it was not.   

River Enza at the mercy of Goddess Kyaa and Dominic Rystan at Dreams of Spanking

Now, I’m not here to say that this film changed me, nor should the incomplete epiphanies on sexuality that I’m sharing here be mistaken for me jumping on a bandwagon. Neither of those are true. What does feel true, is that I’m feeling really aware of my straight privilege after watching this film. 

If you’re a straight person and that term makes you uncomfortable … I feel you. But it should make you uncomfortable. Privilege is a pervasive and dangerous thing when not acknowledged. Honestly, how two-dimensional of me to discount a film like Fetish Fvckdolls 2 as something that couldn’t touch me, something that I wouldn’t be able to identify with! How ridiculous and heteronormative of me to presume that I wouldn’t relate to these scenes. If it was mainstream lesbian porn (you know, the kind performed by cis women for the straight male gaze) would I have been so dismissive? Probably not, because I’m a straight woman who has had sex with other straight women and I’m blisteringly aware of the weight of the male gaze. But I presumed that I wouldn’t relate, or be aroused, by this. 

Confused and intrigued, I discussed my bias with my husband, who has recently (or in his words: finally) self-identified as asexual. He watched part of Fetish Fvckdolls 2 with me and commented immediately that he hadn’t even noticed that the performers were trans until the fourth vignette because he was witnessing them as human beings, rather than sexual fantasies. I was surprised by that, because for me transfemme visibility is the point of the project. He asked what would make a film like Fetish Fvckdolls 2 more “my kind of porno”. I didn’t have an answer because I was processing that actually, this is my kind of porn.  

Confused? Me too. 

Chelsea Poe sucks Pandora Blake's strap-on at Dreams of Spanking

How could I think that gay male chastity porn is more relatable to me than porn that has trans women at the heart of it? Am I secretly kind of a bigot? But I know and love so many queer and trans people! Am I not as straight as I thought? Maybe, but that’s not the primary concern for me. The concern is that even though I think I know so much about sexuality, it turns out I don't know as much as I thought. 

Yes, yes, we like what we like. The heart/loins want what they want. But it’s becoming evident to me now that the shackles of straight privilege (ie: never having to consider your sexuality or have it challenged, because it’s the cultural default setting) are just that: shackles. 

What Fetish Fvckdolls 2 taught me about myself is that heteronormative thinking is limiting because the definitions are so static. “Straight” doesn’t leave much room for variety. Any “exploration” within straight sexuality is expected to be episodic, or at the most, a phase. So when, as a “straight” person, I watched this film, it was a bit dizzying to not see the performers as fantasy objects, and to relate to them on a human level. It revealed to me things I hadn't known before about how objectifying my gaze tends to be.

Fetish Fvckdolls 2 is radical and fresh. It puts trans women at the center of each encounter. Not only are they the subjects of their own experience, they are shown in willing and delighted submission. Not here the degrading porn tropes that cast trans women as exotic freaks with hard cocks, or strip them of autonomy - no, the trans women in Fetish Fvckdolls 2 are very clearly represented as the people they are. Full stop.

Cookie Cosmos submits to Rae Cosmos at Dreams of Spanking

I learned that my erotic appetite, regardless of whom I choose to get frisky with, is essentially about the treatment and experience of the people involved, not the combination of bodies I see on the screen. I began to reflect on what turns me on and what turns me off in adult entertainment: it’s not the bodies at all. It’s the dynamics. I haven’t ignored trans porn in the past because it was trans. I've ignored it because when it’s badly done, it’s so likely to be dehumanising.

Fetish Fvckdolls 2 has been made with such smart and mindful intentions by everyone involved that the sexiness absolutely transcends all notions of genre and the limitations of what I thought I could be into. I  watched the film three times. It’s 90 minutes long. It took me almost 5 hours of watching this film and then more time processing the experience for me to begin to get my head around these personal biases and blindspots. 

What I have learned from Fetish Fvckdolls 2, what I’m so glad to begin to understand about myself, is that I like porn because I watching people fuck. Not just men, not just straight people, not just cishet couples. What I don’t like in porn is mindless and narrowly conceived narratives, and hegemonic control of my gaze. I’m not comfortable knowing that I have been a contributor to that mindlessness, a cog in the wheel of a cultural and artistic system that holds people back, misrepresents them and strips them of humanity, no matter how subtle the effect seems to be. 

Having realised that, I want to do better. I know that I won’t always get it right, but only good can come from growth and empathy. And besides, if nothing else, a whole new world of porn just opened up to me, so if you’ll forgive me, I have some catching up to do … 

Fun, friendship and candid spankings

So much of the delight of porn is the fantasy, isn’t it? We seek storylines and situations that turn us on and tickle our imaginations, allowing us to transport ourselves into the scene and vicariously experience the unknown. As someone who has had a long-standing interest in spanking and being spanked, I realized while watching Pandora’s Birthday Caning, featuring Pandora Blake and Sarah Gregory, that of course spankings can be lighthearted and loosely structured, all while remaining intense and enthusiastically consensual. It’s sometimes easy to forget that spanking, both giving and receiving, can absolutely be a joyful, exuberant act - it needn’t be limited to discipline, humiliation, punishment, or the other more traditional tropes of the genre. 

Pandora Blake spanks Sarah Gregory at Dreams of Spanking

This spanking film shows how fun and friendship can be excellent catalysts to very exciting spanking and caning porn. If you want to watch quality porn films (and clearly you do if you’re here), palpable chemistry between porn performers should be a basic requirement, in my opinion. Even if the scene is less sexually charged, chemistry doesn’t fall to the wayside.

Pandora’s Birthday Caning is a refreshing film in that sense. There is no obvious seduction, no pantomime of desire. The genuine comfort and authenticity between Pandora and Sarah  proves that two people having a warm and sincere conversation alongside OTK spanking can be immensely gratifying to watch. Pandora and Sarah are clearly very comfortable with one another, and that comfort provides a soft and stable grounding to this unscripted, behind the scenes porn film. In lieu of theatrical roles, we get to see sparkling smiles, shy eye contact, sincere compliments and genuine excitement about the thrills of discovering, honing and thoroughly enjoying spanking both professionally and privately. 

Pandora Blake strips for Sarah Gregory at Dreams of Spanking

I absolutely appreciate how genuine this lesbian spanking film is. It’s a conversation between friends and colleagues that creates space for casual erotic experiences to unfold. For me, being able to be a “fly on that wall” is not only intimate and fascinating, it removes the ‘fourth wall’ and makes the whole scene more approachable and accessible than more scripted and dramatic productions. While ‘amateur porn’ has a similar authenticity, a grittiness and realness, and also often lowers that fourth wall, there’s something lovely about watching a personal, candid scene unfolding between two consummate professionals like Pandora and Sarah, shot and edited to professional quality. 

Pandora Blake's bottom with cane stripes on Dreams of Spanking

I love and appreciate when films can help give you a new perspective on things. In this case, Pandora’s Birthday Caning has given me a new way of looking at spanking that I can now take away with me, continue to mull, and incorporate into my own experiences and fantasies - which makes this film the gift that keeps on giving. 

It's coming...

After a quiet year, I have some big news.

Chelsea Poe and Blake in queer porn film Velvet Touch

I filmed this scene in March with queer porn stars Chelsea Poe and Courtney Trouble. Here's what I wrote after the shoot:

I’m stretching my creative wings again with some new queer porn collaborations. Last weekend I filmed a scene with Courtney Trouble and Chelsea Poe with me and Chelsea performing together, which was a dream come true. I have a massive porn crush on Chelsea and we had so much fun. Our scene was (of course!) very kinky and involved butch/femme dynamics, spanking, flogging, makeouts, Chelsea making me squirt everywhere with her fingers and tongue (she kept asking me to cum on her tits, which I’ve never done before - it was very horny) and me sitting on and fucking her face with my cock until we were both drenched in jizz. Chelsea had to hop in the shower afterwards to rinse my cum out of her hair. It was so great to connect with her and I hope we get to work together again.

Courtney, who was our videographer, was so great to work with and made everything super easy. They were warm, sweet and welcoming, delightfully enthusiastic about my gender expression, and helped me get over my nerves. I stopped getting regular pre-shoot anxiety ages ago, but it was a bit scary shooting with two porn icons whom I’ve admired from afar for years. I’m so so glad to have worked with them both and can’t wait to release the finished scene, which is a collaboration and will be distributed through QueerPorn.tv, Dreams of Spanking and other channels.

It's coming. And so are we...

Chelsea Poe and Blake in queer porn film Velvet Touch

The hotness and humiliation of being punished by the Head Girl

The Head Girl punishes a naughty schoolgirl and schoolboy at Dreams of Spanking

I wasn’t sure how I would get on with audio porn. As a writer, part of me loves the idea because I’m all about the sexy words - but I know I can be quite fussy about audiobooks. It’s all about the person reading them, the voice giving you the words. The wrong tone and the story is ruined. With the right voice though, it can be a wonderful experience. Audio porn allows you to use your imagination while listening, and it can be a great way to really put yourself in the scene, especially with the intimacy of earphones.

I shouldn’t have worried though. Pandora Blake, who narrates most of the audio stories on Dreams of Spanking, has a lovely voice that seems perfect for audio porn. Head Girl, written by Rosie Bower, is a smart sexy story that gives a twist to traditional school punishment scenes. Head Girl Julie learns she has to punish her friends for various misdemeanours. When her friends refuse to take the threat of her punishment seriously she finds herself getting angry, and decides to make them respect her authority as Head Girl.

The anger she feels gives Julie confidence in what she is doing, and she takes total control of the situation, forcing her friends' obedience to her will. What I really like about this spanking audio story is the way Rosie Bower shows us the thoughts of each person in the scene. It gives us an insight into what makes each character tick, and delves deep into their embarrassment, humiliation, indignation and other feelings about being punished by Julie.

My favourite punishment in this story was Liam’s, the cool guy who thinks he can get away with doing whatever he wants. The story takes on an extra dimension of hotness when it's revealed that despite himself, the humiliation of the situation is arousing him. His helplessness in the face of his body's betrayal and the way Julie uses it to embarrass him further is really hot. I adored Julie’s glee when she learns how much she enjoys administering punishment. There's a moment when she has to mentally remind herself that this exercise is about teaching Liam an effective lesson, and not about her pleasure. It's delightful - and it made me think that actually it seems very much about both.

As a whole, this story is equal parts hot and discomforting. A school story in which some cool, rebellious kids have to resentfully submit to punishment from their teachers' pet friend is one that many of us might be able to put ourselves into, one way or another. The fact that this is an unwanted punishment, which they still find arousing even as they hate it, creates a delicious tension. It also raises fascinating questions for me about about the psychology of punishment and humiliation.

I have to admit that the character I find myself identifying with the most was Julie. I love the way that she reflects on past resentments and jealousies to fuel her determination to carry the punishment through to its conclusion. And of course, I love dishing out a spanking and decorating a bare bum with marks that will leave a reminder to re-enforce the lesson - and the idea of doing so to my squirming friends who thoroughly deserve it is very appealing.

So my verdict on audio porn? I found this story super hot, and I enjoyed the process of listening to it more than I expected. I enjoyed imagining the scenario and Rosie Bower creates some enticing images that will stay with me. I loved was the image of the two girls bent over the desk, and of Liam bending over clutching his ankles, naked, embarrassed and unable to constrain his erection. So sexy.

The Head Girl punishes a naughty schoolgirl and schoolboy at Dreams of Spanking

This post is illustrated with pictures from Head Girl spanking video A Taste of Their Own Medicine, starring Zoe Montana, Jimmy Holloway and Pandora Blake.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days

Back to School is a super sexy two-part scene starring Molly Malone and Nimue Allen. Nimue is a young teacher who has started working at her girlfriend Molly’s old school, and when Molly comes to pick her up one day they decide to have a little after hours fun.

I love everything about this scene, and I am not alone in that love. It's received more than one fan post; such as this one by Onanist-online, who described it as "one of the sexiest, and beautiful spanking films I have seen in a good while."

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

What makes this film, I think, is the sexy and intimate relationship between Molly and Nimue's characters. Although they aren't a couple in real life, the chemistry sizzles between them. They are so completely and comfortably at ease with each other, and that familiarity makes this a real treat to watch. Alex Reynolds, writing in her blog Spanking Wishes, commented that "because of the obviously strong chemistry between Molly and Nimue, and the romantic elements in the scene, it feels legitimately intimate.” From lingering kisses to sensual caresses, the pair obviously enjoy the opportunity to play together on camera, and seem completely uninhibited.

I particularly thrilled to hear Molly reminiscing about her school days, explaining how she didn’t necessarily enjoy the spankings she received but would still be thinking about them later in the day. This film is a thoughtful exploration of the difference between the fantasy of a non-consensual childhood school punishment, and the sexy reality of an adult couple enjoying consensual spanking roleplay.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

Combining these two sides to spanking gives this scene a taboo element. Spanking Wishes picked up on this; "They’re actually *at* the school, snuck away to have this spanking adventure in a common room. Which is an incredibly hot idea.” I have to say I totally agree. The very appealing way Nimue persuades Molly to put on an old school gym kit (complete with white cotton knickers and knee high socks), adds to the taboo feeling of this scene. While the teasing little conversation about the kit adds to the naughty sexiness, it also reminds us that these are two consenting adults - even if they are playing in a real school, with real school uniform. There is something beautiful and very hot about the smile on Nimue’s face when Molly reappears, blushing, in the gym kit. 

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

I adore the way they connect with each other throughout the spanking, switching roles and positions. Taking time to kiss, stroke, and whisper to each other. They look like they are really enjoying themselves. This connection and consideration of each other just makes the whole scene that much hotter.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking
Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

I love the moment when Nimue is strapping Molly to the spanking bench, and Molly quips “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere”. The bench is a gorgeous antique that evokes so many suggestions of old school halls, Headmaster's offices, and school students tightly strapped in place for punishment. Molly surrenders to the experience beautifully, from the first moment she goes over Nimue's knee, to the point where even the stingy wooden ruler melts her into a puddle of submissive bliss. By the time Nimue picks up the cane, Molly is in a state of total submission. There is something about the way she has completely gives herself over that is very sexy.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

I can’t talk about this scene without mentioning the really delicious noises that Molly makes when being spanked, the way they grow in tempo and pitch as the session continues is so hot, it goes right through you. Truly sexy noises.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

I'm quite into symbolism and for me, there's a lot of it in this scene that reminds me of being at school myself. The white cotton knickers and knee high socks are the white of a virginal veil, and contrast so well with the bright red of both Molly’s bottom after the spanking, and of her painted nails. I love the symmetry of those things, and for me nothing says sexy like bright red nails scraping over a freshly spanked bottom.

Molly Malone and Nimue Allen relive their school days at Dreams of Spanking

I adore this scene; it brings so many different elements together but still manages to fill simple and coherent, and the combined effect of school uniform, a wood and leather spanking bench, sensual kisses, switch roleplay and hard spanking is very hot.

The anticipation before the drop

We are thrilled to have sex blogger HornyGeekGirl, an erotica author and self-proclaimed spanking enthusiast, as a new contributor to this blog. Please give her a warm welcome!

I love wax play. Delivering it, I love the feeling of joy at every little squeak and wiggle your partner makes. I especially love dripping hot wax onto a freshly spanked, flogged or caned bottom. Receiving it, there's the split-second sting of the heat as it hits, that lovely warming feeling as more is added, and then the sheer pleasure of it being picked, peeled or scraped off. It’s delicious.

Hot Wax starring Tai Crimson and Pandora Blake really captures the deliciousness of wax play. Right from the first photo, we see Tai’s smile of anticipation ... which turns to slight trepidation when Pandora pulls back her hair to whisper in her ear. Then there's the small smile on Pandora’s face as she lights the first candle. You can really feel the tension as Tai awaits that first droplet of hot wax. 

Tai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of Spanking

For me that anticipation is half the fun of wax play, and this image shows that perfectly. It’s the deep breath before the first stinging drip falls. I like the symmetry of being able to see a profile of each performer’s face. They both seem to focus on the candle, even though I know Tai probably can’t really see it.

Tai's face is a study in this photo gallery. There is something almost blissful in Tai’s expression as Pandora drips the first trail of colour from higher up, which changes to lip-biting pain as the wax - and the heat - get closer to her skin, until the wax leaves pink heat marks on her upper back.

Tai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of SpankingTai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of Spanking

I love the dynamic between the two of them. The comfortable ease expressed in Pandora’s gleeful enjoyment of Tai’s pain, and the total trust Tai shows even when wax is being dripped in very intimate places. Which brings me to the other hot thing about this photo gallery. After all that build up, the pay off is a sequence of incredibly naughty photos as Pandora teases apart Tai's bottom checks, tantalising her with the idea of hot wax being dripped into that most sensitive spot... and then lands drop after fat drop right onto her exposed hole. That range of photos made me wince and wiggle, and witnessing Tai’s pleasure at the pain really appealed to the domme side of me that likes to hurt people just the way they like it.

Tai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of SpankingTai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of Spanking

The final two images in the set are the perfect finish. It's lovely to see the two performers basking in the afterglow of the scene they’ve just shared - and it's clear from their faces that they loved every minute.

Tai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of SpankingTai Crimson and Pandora Blake play with hot wax at Dreams of Spanking

Shooting in a cinematic style - the story behind our new film 'Houseboy'

Our new film Houseboy is a departure from the usual videos on Dreams of Spanking - and most other spanking sites. This is our first attempt at a cinematic short film, aiming for a higher standard of cinematography and storytelling than we are usually able to achieve. I wasn't planning to shoot this way from the start - it came about from a convergence of factors that created the perfect opportunity to try something new.

Casting Tai Crimson

It started last year, when I met an enthusiastically kinky and ridiculously cute young person from San Francisco. He was gorgeous, he loved spanking - he could certainly take it - and he expressed an interest in shooting for Dreams of Spanking. He wasn't old enough at that point to perform in porn, but I said that once he turned 18 I'd be very happy to work with him. We made plans to shoot together when he was next in the UK - which happened to be May 2015, less than a week after his eighteenth birthday. How's that for a coming-of-age celebration?

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

I normally prefer to work with kinksters who are a little older, simply because I value emotional maturity and experience in the people I shoot with. I think the common fetish for "barely 18" performers in porn is partly based on the idea that young performers are vulnerable, and so it's easier to take advantage of them and push their limits. I find this sleazy and totally unethical, and I'd always much rather work with older players who know their own minds and are able to look after themselves. It's important to me that the performers I hire can take responsibility for their own limits and communication, are experienced enough players to know their bodies and their preferences, and are secure in their decision to appear in fetish porn - because once you've done it, there's no going back.

When I met Tai, however, he exploded all of my preconceptions. Although a teenager, he has a rock solid sense of his kinky identity, and he's been exploring his interest in private for years. He is calm, confident, intelligent, self-reliant, and very emotionally mature. So at eighteen and a few days, Tai officially beats Talia Lane to the position of youngest performer on Dreams of Spanking - and yes, we do have his ID on file to prove it!

We put a date in the diary, and meanwhile Tai and I exchanged emails discussing his interests and preferences. But by March this year, when I needed to start firming up plans, I already knew that ATVOD were investigating Dreams of Spanking and that I was likely to have to stop updating the site for a duration of several months while my appeal was underway. I had lots of scenes already shot starring Fauni, Mike, Talia and David and others which I wasn't going to be able to publish, so there was absolutely no point spending money and energy shooting more material that might never see the light of day.

Towards a cinematic style

Meanwhile, I'd attended the British Fetish Film Festival in February and the Berlin Porn Film Festival last October, and I'd been thinking an awful lot about shooting styles, production values, and the budget and time constraints under which I was shooting.

Over five years I have developed a shoot style that produces one 10-15 minute spanking film per hour, in a remarkably stress free environment, with plenty of breaks. This is based on improvised scenes filmed live by one or two handheld camera operators, with perhaps some close-ups or cutaways to enhance anticipation in the build up to the spanking scenes, but otherwise shot with as few cuts as possible - unless the performers themselves need to cut. Lightweight, consumer-grade cameras make handheld shooting manageable without the camera operators getting too tired, and using auto-focus allows us to get visual variety by roaming around the scene shooting different angles, rather than stopping the action to reset each shot.

This non-disruptive shooting style allows the performers to get into an immersive scene space and stay in character, which helps the roleplay flow more smoothly, and also helps the bottom stay in their headspace and makes the spanking itself easier to take. It's a system that Nimue and I have got down to a fine art, and I was pleased that we'd reached a point where we could create nice-looking films within budget, while maintaining a relaxed and fun shoot environment for everyone involved.

The downside of this low-key shooting style is that the resulting films would never achieve the cinematic quality that I was seeing at the film festivals I was going to. I'd had a couple of films rejected from international festivals, presumably because the videography, audio quality and storytelling wasn't up to scratch. I found myself wanting to level up, and see if with a bit more money, time and effort, I could raise my production values and put Dreams of Spanking on the map as a credible producer of cinema-quality films.

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

So rather than hire Tai for a day shooting a number of improvised ten minute website updates, I decided to use him to do something different. I booked amazing boudoir photographer Matt Christie to help out with the videography - he'd expressed an interest in shooting video last time we shot together, he has a commercial-grade camera and he also had access to an amazing location perfect for the scenario I had in mind.

I started penning ideas for a single 10-15 minute short film. Not five films, or six films, or seven. Just one.

Developing the story

With Tai, I had an articulate and gorgeous masculine-of-center performer with a submissive streak a mile wide, who loved being spanked. I thought about the films I was seeing at festivals, and the lack of beautifully-shot female/male BDSM films shot from a female perspective, with a male submissive who is both beautiful and interesting, and not just a cipher propping up a sexually objectified female dominant. Instead of this I wanted to make Tai the lust object and protagonist of the film, focussing both the lens on his body, and the story on his character's journey.

I started with a fairly traditional plot - a young man applying for a submissive role in the household of an established mistress. I brainstormed ideas for visual storytelling, thinking about ways to focus the storyline on the tension and anticipation Tai's character feels before he takes the plunge towards fulfilling his submissive desires. I considered ways to create an interesting power dynamic between his character and mine. I quickly realised that I'd need a third performer, another submissive serving the mistress - someone to make his arrival at the house feel more formal and more intimidating.

I'd already talked to my friend Eliza Grey about having her on set as a shoot assistant, helping out behind the camera (she had planned to be with us on our shoot in November, but had sadly been unable to make it). I realised she'd be perfect for the role of a bitchy receptionist, enhancing Tai's nerves before his interview with the Madame... and once I'd cast Eliza, the rest of the story fell into place. 

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

Writing the script

Ten days before the shoot, I was hurrying to finish the script on my laptop on the train. I'd never written lines for characters to say before, and I was finding it surprisingly difficult. I'd write a line, then agonise over it. What if Tai doesn't feel comfortable saying that? What if that's not what Eliza would say? I've always made a political point of not putting words in my performers' mouths, and suddenly that was what I was literally doing. At the same time I was all-too-aware that they were going to need to memorise their lines, and time was running out.

I closed my eyes, wrote some lines telling myself they were only placeholders, and sent it off with an apologetic email saying this was a very rough draft, and inviting them to make any changes they wanted. But my anxiety proved unfounded. In the end, bar one wording change, that script was the one we used - and Tai and Eliza rocked it.

Working with a storyboard

A week before the shoot I was on D's sofa after a fetish party, scribbling a 'storyboard' in biro on A4 paper from his printer while my friends chatted around me. After writing the screenplay I had a strong visual image in my mind's eye of what most of the shots would look like - now it was just a case of creating a visual reference so I could communicate my ideas to Matt on the day. I'd visited Matt's location a week ago, so the rooms were fresh in my mind. It was a useful exercise to think through camera angles and compose the shots, but I'm pretty sure it was the crappiest storyboard anyone has ever worked from. The most hilarious of my terrible stick figure drawings was this sketch of Eliza being spanked over my knee and feeling sad about it:

Professional production all round, innit.

The day of the shoot

The shoot day approached. I bought food and props, looked up travel options, packed suitcases, selected implements, printed scripts and release forms. Shortly before the day I realised that I'd inadvertently booked our shoot on the same day as the London Marathon, and the location we were using was only one block away from the route. That meant that not only would transport potentially be disrupted, but the exterior shots would all have a huge amount of background noise. Still, at this late stage there was nothing to be done about it. I booked an 8am taxi, the traffic at that hour was fine, and I was on set at 9am. Matt and I drank coffee and looked through the storyboard, then Tai and Eliza arrived - and it was all go.

Shooting from a script was a totally new experience for me, and a steep learning curve. I'd worked out the best shooting order, shooting the story in as close to chronological order as possible while minimising room and lighting changes. After that it was just a question of staying calm, following the callsheet and taking it one shot at a time.

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

I was using an external mic for the first time, and was grateful to have Eliza helping out and sharing the responsibility for making sure the mic was a) close enough, b) not in shot, and c) recording each time. She was also an absolute star helping out with moving lights, checking camera batteries and memory cards, making tea and tidying up behind us. A+++, would work with again. Plus it turned out she could seriously act...

It was a full day, perhaps a bit too full - nerves started to fray after a few hours, and everyone was feeling tired by mid-afternoon. The shoot would definitely have been easier with more camera crew or fewer scenes to fit in. After a few hours, Matt noticed a round smudge in the middle of the lens, and wiped it off - but of course there wasn't time to go back and re-shoot the shots we'd already done. By the time we came to shoot the confrontation between Tai and Eliza in the kitchen, everyone was so tired that that scene took about seven takes. Some of the shots ended up out of focus, and we got through so many cans of tonic that I was worried we'd run out!

Editing the film

Still, despite all that, when I came to look at the footage I was pleased to discover that most of it looked how I'd expected. There were a few surprises in the edit - such as that moment when I realised the reverse shot in one dialogue scene crossed the line and was therefore unusable, and was suddenly grateful that we'd shot three angles of that particular scene, even though at the time it felt like overkill. It was a monster of an edit, but satisfying too, sorting through all the footage, plugging it into place, and seeing how the scenes I'd envisioned in my mind played out on camera. 

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

Choosing the music was another daunting prospect - I knew I wanted to avoid re-using the same creative commons soundtracks that you hear time and time again in indie porn, and that meant spending money. But how to start looking? First I worked out where music was needed - in the intro sequence, the montage, and the closing credits, which meant I needed two or three pieces in total. Then I did a rough edit of those sequences so I had a vague idea of how long the music would need to be. After that, I set a day aside to browse SoundDogs, typing in different keywords and playing pieces with my eyes closed, visualing the film, until I hit on a genre that felt right. I realised that for this story my usual taste in piano and cello-dominated classical and film score music wouldn't work - Tai's character needed something moody and masculine, guitar-led, energetic and driving. Finally I whittled down a selection, downloaded some samples and started laying them over the edit to see what worked.

Primarily, this film was intended to be screened at film festivals - which meant that the narrative would have a different structure than standard spanking films. In a film intended for someone to watch while having a wank, you need a carefully paced build-up and pay-off that sustains uninterrupted shots of climactic spanking action for long enough for the viewer to reach orgasm. In a longer film, there might be two of three of these build-ups and climaxes, separated by character-driven story. But at a film festival, the audience are watching to have their minds stimulated, not their genitals. Fast-paced editing is preferable, providing lots of new visual information with every shot. Explicit sequences need to be edited down to the bare minimum necessary to develop the characters and progress the story. So that was a new challenge: cutting the 15 minutes of high quality spanking action in, for instance, Tai's audition scene, down to the three minutes earmarked for it in the festival edit. The only way I was able to do it was by promising myself that I'd release the full, uncut scene as an extended edition on Dreams of Spanking later. But meanwhile the deadline for the Berlin Porn Film Festival was June 30th, so I had to get the shorter edit finished first...

In the end, thankfully, it was finished in time to submit to Berlin, and I'm hopeful that they'll accept it. I'll be submitting it to various other film festivals over the summer as well. I'm really happy with the finished film, and completely honoured to have been trusted with Tai and Eliza's porn debuts - and thrilled that they had a good time.

Houseboy - a new cinematic short fetish film by Dreams of Spanking

And that's a wrap!

It was a really long shoot day. We finished the scheduled shots around 7pm, 10 hours after I'd arrived on set. But then we cracked open the champagne and ended up chatting and buzzing on a total high, which led to another two hours shooting performer interviews, and even a behind the scenes caning for Tai when he confessed he still didn't think he'd been spanked enough...

By the time we finally turned the cameras off, sat down for some supper and tidied everything away, the sun had gone down - and it was 11pm before I finally got into a cab. Matt and I had been on set for fourteen hours, Tai and Eliza for thirteen. I am so grateful to the three of them for their enthusiasm, dedication and professionalism. It was a long fucking shoot and everyone put in so much energy and creativity it was kind of overwhelming. Overall, this production cost ten times as much as an average Dreams of Spanking video, but even so I still came away feeling like I hadn't paid people enough for the amount of work they'd put in.

In conclusion

Overall, this was a very satisfying project, and I'm really happy to have it under my belt. But it also taught me a lot about the trade-off that arises when you move towards a more cinematic shooting style. My previous method gave my performers more breaks, less stress and a much more satisfying kink experience. Shooting Houseboy, we did the bare minimum of spanking needed to get the shots I wanted - and stopping to move the camera, check the focus and lighting, consult the storyboard every few seconds made it hard to get immersed into a satisfying spanking headspace. I'm glad I hadn't scripted any particularly hard spanking scenes, because I think severe corporal punishment would be much more emotionally and physically challenging to take in this context.

I hadn't realised it before, but shooting in a more amateur style results in a much more rewarding experience for the performers - with more opportunity for top and bottom to develop an in-scene chemistry, focus on each other rather than the camera, and time for the bottom to sink into a yummy submissive headspace, without constant distractions.

So what can I take away from this? Well, I've learned that shooting in a cinematic style is something I can do, and that's good to know. I've learned that it's hard work, at least ten times as expensive as my usual shooting style, and considerably more time-consuming to produce and edit. It's also exhilarating, exhausting, and very creatively satisfying. I'm glad I stepped out of my comfort zone and gave it a go, and I'm hopeful that the finished film will be screened in Berlin this year. But I've also learned that I don't want to start shooting this way every time. Perhaps I might be able to put out one cinematic film a year, but this experiment has restored my faith in my usual low-key way of shooting, which it turns out is preferable experience for me and my performers - and a much better environment to ask people to take hard spankings in. Our standard Dreams of Spanking shoots emphasise process over product, and trying something new has re-affirmed my faith in that process.

You can watch the long-play trailer for Houseboy below - and if you're a site member, please watch the full film and tell me what you think - and make sure you also check out the extended editions of Tai's and Eliza's spanking scenes, performer interviews and Tai's off-the-cuff behind the scenes caning.

The ultimate school bully fantasy

Sometimes I watch a spanking film and realise halfway through that I should probably be wearing headphones. The crisp smacking sounds of a particularly thorough beating, or the squeals of a protesting character, echo around the room and I belatedly realise that someone might be able to hear. Then there are the films which are so thoroughly absorbing I forget about headphones, and it’s only after the credits roll that I remember I have neighbours. This was one of the latter.

Pandora plays the school bully, and Ten Amorette the innocent schoolgirl who refuses to hand over her lunch money. What ensues is a fast-paced bondage takedown, involving girl-on-girl wrestling, spanking, struggling, and a harsh thrashing with the strap.

Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking

Pandora and Ten have an amazing chemistry, as evidenced by the fact that they can play scenes at such different ends of the roughness spectrum. This week’s spanking video couldn’t be more different in tone from the caring, erotic spanking in ‘The Surprise Present’ - that one started with a sensual flogging and ended with kisses and caresses, whereas this is rough, angry and aggressive.

Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking
Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking

I’m biased, because many of my teenage fantasies involved the idea of being punished by a prefect or older school student for some imagined or invented slight, but holy God this scene is hot. Two schoolgirls in matching sexy uniforms – white knee socks, black patent heels, and tiny short skirts – having a ferocious schoolgirl catfight that ends with the dominant one wrestling the other to the floor and stripping her skirt and knickers, and giving her a sound spanking...

Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking
Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking

It's hot not just for the dynamic between Pandora and Ten - which is smoking - or for the school uniforms complete with tiny skirts, tight shirts, and ties that are used to leave Ten bound and gagged on the floor. Or for the speed - the swift movements with which Pandora throws Ten to the ground, the struggle, the wrestling, the conflict. The extra-hot touches, like Pandora's hand clamped over Ten's mouth, smothering her cries, or the harsh slap to her face that tells her who's got the power.

Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking
Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking
Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking

It’s uniquely sexy because of the combination of all these things - because of the sheer number of knicker-moistening triggers that are effortlessly tossed into one scene. The cruelty. The resistance. The humiliation. The vicious strokes of the leather strap.

It's just the whole damn fantasy.

Ten Amorette in school uniform bound, gagged and spanked at Dreams of Spanking

New update: Provocative Housework behind the scenes

Well, this one isn't exactly new - in fact it's been up on the site for a couple of weeks. But what with campaigning against the new porn legislation, unexpectedly being invited to debate the legislation on Channel 4 News, sessions, spanking parties, and spending a couple of days in Birmingham pair-editing some of the scenes for our new joint project with Nimue Allen, I'm a bit behind on blogging! Which means that I've got quite a few blogposts lined up for you over the holidays - what better time to get a daily dose of spanking updates to while away the Christmas break?

When it's the stunning Lola Marie in front of the camera, it's always worth looking back a couple of weeks to show you some new behind the scenes goodness...

Provocative Housework: Behind the scenes

Performers: Lola Marie, Pandora Blake

Out-takes and fun behind the scenes during the shooting of Provocative Housework - including Lola's impression of Patsy from Ab Fab, Lola admiring the old-school oven and iron in the shoot kitchen, scene planning, sexy wiggling, funny faces and silly voices, Pandora admiring Lola's bruises, and both of them actually cleaning the oven!

Lola is her usual bubbly self in this behind the scenes video, which includes quite a few silly voices and faces. She was such fun to have on set. I can't wait to work with her again in 2015!

Lola Marie behind the scenes at Dreams of Spanking Lola Marie behind the scenes at Dreams of Spanking Lola Marie behind the scenes at Dreams of Spanking

Housework is more fun in your underwear

From cleaning the bathroom wearing only your knickers to scrubbing the oven in sexy lingerie and heels – housework is far more fun when you're just wearing underwear. And it's certainly more interesting to watch.

Lola Marie does a spectacular job of tempting Pandora Blake in this week's spanking video – stripping down to a sexy black bra, thong and sexy high heels, and deliberately posing so she shows off her gorgeous bum.

Lola Marie bends over and shows off her bottom at Dreams of Spanking Lola Marie bends over and shows off her bottom at Dreams of Spanking

I find it hard to work when my partner's around – there's a temptation to play, chat, and generally have more fun than I'd have on my own with a laptop. That's one of the reasons why I love this scene – Lola Marie and Pandora capture the flirtatious chemistry of a couple going about their domestic routine, and the ease with which normal household things can turn into something much more interesting.

Lola Marie gets spanked in sexy lingerie at Dreams of Spanking Lola Marie gets spanked in sexy lingerie at Dreams of Spanking

Lola Marie gets a spanking, of course – who would be able to resist her cheeky grin and wiggling bottom when she's keen to play? And as ever I'm impressed at just how much hard spanking she can take, reacting with 'oohs' and giggles as Pandora thoroughly warms her beautiful bottom.

I love Lola Marie's insouciance – she's completely perfect in scenes where she's flirting or bratting her way into a spanking. There's something about her amazing sexy smile that says “I've just got exactly what I want.”

Lola Marie gets spanked in sexy lingerie at Dreams of Spanking Lola Marie gets spanked in sexy lingerie at Dreams of Spanking

I'm especially impressed that, as a result of her provocative behaviour, Lola Marie manages to get Pandora to join in with the cleaning...

Lola Marie gets spanked in sexy lingerie at Dreams of Spanking

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