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The dark fantasies of Tai Crimson

Posted at 15:32 on 1 Sep 2016 by Pandora Blake in anal CP, anal eroticism, cane, edgy, explicit sex, F|F, hard punishment, hot wax, Nimue Allen, Nimue Allen (tog), Pandora Blake, Pandora Blake (tog), severe, shoots, strap-on, Tai Crimson, trans, welts

The reason Dreams of Spanking is called dreams is that one of the core concepts of the site is to clarify the boundary between fantasy and reality. This is important to me because my fantasies are often fucking twisted.

I get off to thinking about being bound, violated, totally helpless, and punished against my will. This does not mean I endorse or desire non-consensual acts in real life: far from it, my edgy fantasies make me more invested in enacting and promoting good consent and communication, and in making sure I don't ever take advantage of anyone, or let myself be taken advantage of. Those of us with dark sexual psyches have good reason to think hard about the ethics of erotic power, and how to play with these ideas in a safe, securely-contained space that doesn't impinge on the real world. Actually doing something to someone against their will might be fine to dream about, but it's totally off-limits in reality.

So exploring that boundary line, where dreams end and reality begins, is one of the ideas behind this site: that's why we never publish an edgy non-consent fantasy without accompanying it with behind the scenes videos, out-takes and performer interviews, to show you that fantasy is just fantasy, and make visible the reality behind it. It's also become a policy of mine to not write non-consent scenarios for performers. If I come up with a film idea that is really dark and twisted, I'll either play the submissive role myself, or assign it to another performer only after they've raised the idea of shooting something similar; in that case, I'll run the script past them and amend it to suit their taste before we shoot. But my preference is to work with spankees who have a strongly-developed sense of their own kinky sexuality, and who come to the shoot with scenario ideas of their own.

That's one of the many, many reasons why Tai Crimson was such a pleasure to work with. 

When we were making plans for our second shoot with her - the first since she came out as transgender - she sent me the link to her sex menu, and invited me to peruse it before coming up with scenario ideas. Reading it, I learned two things: firstly, that Tai is the most self-assured teenage pervert I have ever met, and secondly, that she is even filthier than I am. A lot of the stuff on Tai's sex menu already takes me out of my comfort zone - for instance, her fetish for "swirlies", which is when a bully shoves your head in the toilet and flushes it. Luckily, I'm relatively practised at navigating discomfort, and perfectly happy to up the ante and add further twists and intensity until the scenario comes back into the realm of my own twisted imagination. Sometimes two wrongs really do make a right. For instance, one of the scene negotiations went like this:

me: (reads Tai's sex menu) How about a school bully scene including slapping, spanking, wedgies and (maybe) swirling, with Nimue topping Tai?

Tai: Oh gosh, yes! Struggling/roughhousing that leads to being facesat on & taunted might be a nice addition as well. Plenty of fun bully stuff to toss in as well - like, say, having armpits shoved in my face. (My ass, thighs, and tits are also open for punching!)

me: Awesome! How about having you be cousins, or even foster siblings in a shared home, and it be an after-school type thing with both of you still in uniform? With Nimue threatening to get you in trouble if you don't do what she says - actually having you both be in care would make this EXTRA edgy, as she could threaten to get you kicked out. If that's too dark, I will totally understand :)

Tai: Personally, it's dark enough that it just made me wet. Which is a resounding yes.

The shoot was at my place, and we were together for two days and two nights. The first day was spent shooting trade content for Nimue's World, and Tai's forthcoming Amateur Porn studio. I got to witness the filthy hotness that is Tai first hand, viewing some incredibly hot scenes from behind the camera. Tai and Nimue have great chemistry, and I really enjoyed watching it develop over the course of the day. For Nimue's site we shot a bathroom control scene, an introductory striptease, a tit torture photoset and a queer sex scene; and for Tai's clip store it got even kinkier, with a figging and anal ice cube scene, a bondage and tickling scene, a super-edgy interrogation scene, and a forced intoxication/breath play scene where Tai was forced to smoke weed and hold it in, only breathing when Nimue permitted her to. I have to admit that it's unusual for me to feel like the least kinky person in the room, but there's no denying that Tai and Nimue are way ahead of me.

So by day two, shooting four videos and two photosets for Dreams of Spanking, we were all warmed up and ready to roll. Last time we shot with her, we didn't get the chance to shoot an introductory photoset with Tai, as the day was already over-full getting all the shots we needed for our cinematic production Houseboy. So this time, we kicked things off with a cutesy photoset of Tai as an adorable schoolgirl, showing off her new girly look, her spankable bottom, and her puffy, newly developing breasts. 

I quickly discovered that shooting an innocent photoset with Tai is pretty much impossible. She loves being looked at, and as she removed her clothes the evidence of her arousal became more and more visible. This gallery is going live on the site this week, so you don't have to wait much longer to see how horny she got...

Throughout the shoot, Tai was taking selfies and updating her Twitter - which I thoroughly recommend following. I love this behind the scenes shot of her spread-eagled on the bed before our next scene, posting to the internet while she waited for me to be ready:

The next scene was another photoset - this time a domme/sub scenario with me using Tai's body as a pretty canvas for colourful hot wax. I bought these coloured play candles from Kink Craft at Eroticon earlier this year - they're lovely people, and I highly recommend their toys! I've played with wax before in private, but never brought it into a shoot. Tai was the perfect model, whimpering (and getting more and more turned on) as the wax dripped on her body - including in her most intimate places.

I really enjoyed covering her in colours to match my bedspread, making her wriggle and squirm, and seeking out all her sensitive spots. We also learned that the wax that burned hottest was the black one - and it left Tai with some lovely pink marks, as well as the beautiful decoration of the wax itself.

Once Tai had brushed all the wax off (and we'd shaken out the sheets!) we stayed in the bedroom for our first video - a more sexually explicit scene than the usual fare on Dreams of Spanking. When I first shot with Tai, she mentioned how much she loved anal play and big butt plugs. These are two of my favourite things too, and initially the Houseboy script had an extra femdom BDSM scene where I tormented Tai in all sorts of delicious, sexy ways. Sadly, we had to cut it due to lack of time, so when I planned to shoot with her again I was even more eager to make sure we got the chance to indulge in some butt play.

Tai is infamous for her love of anal CP - that is, smacking the butthole itself, rather than the buttocks as in traditional spanking. It's more exposing, more humiliating, more intimate and much more vulnerable. It's one of my big kinks too, and I was thrilled to have the chance to explore it on camera with a fellow queer femme who gets it.

Finally, once I'd warmed up Tai's hole, her cheeks and her thighs with smacks of my hand and my whippiest implements, the scene culminated with a strap-on fucking with my biggest dildo. This isn't the first time I've done this on camera, but it is the first time on Dreams of Spanking. Tai took it beautifully, and the scene was very real, very powerful, and very hot. It was an honour to explore something new together on film, and I can't wait to share the results with you.

After lunch, we moved to the lounge for the foster home bullying scene mentioned above. I got to take a break from performing, and it was gorgeous watching Nimue and Tai work their magic, with Tai as the new kid in the home, and Nimue as the boss bitch who smacks her around. This scene was straight out of Tai's filthy imagination, combining forced undressing, some tit and face slapping, lots of super edgy degradation and verbal abuse, over the knee spanking, wedgies and - last but not least - the ultimate humiliation: shoving Tai's face in the toilet, and flushing it.


I would never have written this scene if Tai hadn't listed all of these acts in such glowing, horny terms in her sex menu. Watching this scene unfold from behind the camera was a real treat. It's lovely to know that after ten years in porn, things can still surprise me - and I can discover the appeal of acts I never thought of as hot before. I'm grateful to Tai for being so authentic, so utterly open about her filthiest fantasies, and for trusting us to realise them for her. Even if wedgies and swirlies aren't your bag, I think Tai's total immersion and submission in this scene makes it really watchable - you can tell how into it she is, and it was wonderful to see her face light up when she talked about it in the post-scene interview!

I'd love to say that after the toilet-flushing everything got lighter and fluffier, but I'm afraid that it just escalated from there. The last two scenes of the day were, if anything, even more intense.

Although Tai had received lots of pain and domination so far, she hadn't been spanked with much other than the hand. That was about to change: our penultimate scene, lifted straight out of her sex menu, featured me as a no good, very bad therapist, and Tai as my vulnerable young client who confides her kinky fantasies to me. I shame her for having them, tell them that they're disgusting and wrong, and then take sadistic advantage of the situation and coerce her to take 'corrective punishment' from me.

It's interesting to note that even describing this scene to you now, I'm feeling a flutter of nervousness and vulnerability that you'll think I'm a terrible, terrible person for having this scene on my site. It's a fantasy that goes so strongly against the core principles of my morality - that there's nothing wrong with being kinky, that you shouldn't be ashamed about what turns you on - that I'm shy even about telling you we filmed it, even though you already know it was Tai's idea, not mine. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with this being a fantasy of Tai's, either. That would be pretty ironic.

But I can tell you that I struggled to shoot this scene. I had to call cut at some point, just because I knew that my toppy dialogue sucked and I was totally failing to be the nasty, shaming abuser that Tai's fantasy required. Tai patiently fed me the script - "Tell me I'm a perverted freak, that there's something wrong with me, that no respectable or normal girl would be into stuff like this, that I deserve everything I get" - and I nodded and took some breaths, and we got back into character and tried again. I think we got there in the end.

It was pretty humbling, though. It's not often that the top is the one that has to safeword: and it renewed my admiration for Tai's strong sense of self; how aware and assured and accepting she is of her sexuality, that she can take ownership of her own shame scripts in this sort of consensual play. I hope the scene turned out well enough to do her wholeheartedness justice, despite my hesitance in the role of the kink-shaming authority figure.

I can attest that she took a pretty hard beating with some wickedly painful implements, including my much-hated stingy bathbrush, and the senior tawse. By the end of this scene Tai's bottom was ... well, crimson.


Then it was time for the final scene of the day; the caning Tai had been dreaming of since before she first shot for us.

By this point, you won't be surprised to hear that the plot involves unfair punishment and excessive severity. Tai plays her character from the bullying scene with Nimue; Nimue tattled that Tai was smoking and selling weed, and I play their overly strict caregiver who believes everything Nimue says, and punishes Tai with a hard caning. Luckily, I am 100% secure in my confidence that hard caning is something Tai loves and craves, and so it was easier for me this time to get into character and bring it to life. 


It also helped that giving hard canings is one of my favourite things to do - I love the craft of it, lining up perfectly parallel lines and judging the accuracy and power just right. Tai took it beautifully, and I'm delighted with this scene, and everything else we shot that day. I very much hope that she was satisfied with the results!

It was a pleasure and a privilege to host Tai's first shoot as a female spankee, and to assist one more trans girl in the valiant mission of queering up the spanking scene. It certainly needs it. All I can say is, those spanking sites that won't shoot trans performers are totally missing out. Tai is a treasure, and I can't wait to share her scenes with you all.

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<3

Posted by Tai Crimson at 16:34 on 1 Sep 2016
Tearing up a little right now, but it's totally the estrogen's fault. I'm so happy and proud of everything we shot, and continue to be over the moon that Dreams exists; a site for whom representation of marginalized folk in spanking is part of its core ethos. Thank you so much, Pandora.

(And P.S. - I was absolutely satisfied with the results of that caning! Even though next time we'll definitely get some tears~)
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