If you've been following this site for a while, you might have noticed something missing. Although the archive is crammed with hot spanking videos, and many of them show me playing with real life partners and lovers (particularly my top of ten years, Thomas), one person has been conspicuous by their absence: my long-term boyfriend and dominant, D.
D and I have created plenty of photosets together, but he's never topped me on video. As a dominant he is relaxed and spontaneous, and the idea of following a script, playing a character and pretending to scold and punish me isn't really him. He's an exhibitionist, but unlike me, he doesn't enjoy performing.
It's a point of principle for me as a director not to pressure anyone to do anything they aren't comfortable with. So we've always stayed within D's comfort zone, shooting occasional photosets that didn't make him feel like he was acting. Until now.
Now, there is a spanking video starring me and D on Dreams of Spanking - and with a 50 stroke cold caning, he certainly knows how to make an entrance.
When I set up my fundraising campaign to raise money to help non-profit organisation Backlash challenge the new UK porn laws, D was behind me every step of the way. Our shared political values are one of the fundamentals of our relationship, and we've both always been active in politics in different ways. When I told him I needed someone to beat me on video to fight internet censorship, he was happy to step forward - no acting necessary.
This was the longest, hardest caning D has ever given me. Dishing out fifty hard cane strokes on film purely for the sake of it was never going to be his cup of tea - but as an act of political protest? Sure.
Speaking of cups of tea, one of my favourite moments in this free caning film is jjust before stroke sixteen, when I insist on pausing the caning so I can finish my half-drunk cuppa. It turns out that taking fifteen hard cane strokes on the bare bottom is the perfect way to pass the time while you wait for your tea to cool to the ideal drinking temperature. What better pick-me-up to boost my spirits for the remaining strokes? This is a protest film about the new UK porn laws, after all - and I don't think there's any combination more British than tea and caning.
I love the playfulness and affection between D and me in this video. We were both being ourselves, no roleplay, no characters, and watching it back the dynamic feels very true to our relationship. He doesn't usually watch my spanking videos, but he watched this one and chuckled his way through it at our banter and in-jokes. "It feels very us," he told me. "We're adorkable."
If you've ever looked at my steamy photosets with D and felt curious about our relationship, and wanted to meet the man behind the pictures, watch this film. It's about as honest a portrait of the two of us as you can get.
Apart from the caning, of course. That bit's completely out of character.
Confession: I like the words 'corporal punishment' possibly even more than I like the word 'spanking.' There's more tied up in the phrase than just the simple act of smacking someone on the bottom.
I'm not saying we should rename this site to 'dreams of corporal punishment'. The beauty of 'spanking' is that it encompasses so much – from the erotic spanking between two people who are achingly horny for each other to the cold, harsh punishment of master to servant, and even the experimental sadism of the mad scientist studying pain.
Corporal punishment, though, summons a specific kind of institutional discipline, with rituals, traditions and rules. This week's unusual corporal punishment film has exactly that – but with a twist that I think makes it way more compelling.
Obviously for 'compelling' read: hot as all hell.
Mike Pain plays a strict headmaster, with very precise and firm ideas about discipline. Pandora tells me that the idea for this scene was inspired by Mike's upbringing in very strict South African schools, where corporal punishment was part of day to day life. (If this is of interest, check out Mike's interview at the bottom of the scene page for more real-life details of corporal punishment in the 1960s.)
In this scene, it's not a naughty student getting spanked, but a fellow member of staff. Pandora Blake plays the naïve new teacher, keen to impose discipline but totally unfamiliar with the school's methods. So Mr Pain offers to give her a distinctive training session - using himself as the subject.
As Pandora eagerly asks for a demonstration of how to administer corporal punishment, Mike obligingly bends over the desk. First with his trousers on, he lets Ms Blake test her right arm by smacking him on the bottom with a slipper. As she spanks him, he gives her suitable encouragement, and tips about the best place to land a swat. But in the classroom, Ms Blake would use the slipper on the bare bottom - and so as they gradually grow more comfortable with each other, the headmaster pulls down his trousers and pants so Ms Blake can get the full experience.
So what's the twist? Well, in most corporal punishment scenes, the focus is on correcting poor behaviour. You'd expect a teacher administering discipline to be firm and professional – swinging carefully calculated strokes to proportionately match the seriousness of the misdemeanour. In this scene, though, not only is the beating not a punishment, there's an extra spark flying between Ms Blake and Mr Pain. It's a spark that I suspect many Dreams of Spanking fans will recognise, and it's that moment when you realise not only do you find this spanking thing incredibly hot, but the person you're talking to does as well.
It's a gorgeous twist on a traditional punishment scenario, mainly because I think so many people will empathise with it. It certainly takes me back to those moments when unwitting partners have playfully smacked me on the bottom only to see the lightbulb go on over my head - and recognise that this might just be the start of something we have in common.
Mike's reassuring instructions and encouragement as Pandora beats him with the slipper and the vicious wooden ruler really does it for me. The characters have different levels of spanking experience – headmaster Mr Pain is an old hand while Ms Blake is a spanking newbie – but in terms of enjoyment, you can tell they're equally into it. From the glint in Ms Blake's eyes as she exclaims over the bright red marks left by the slipper, to Mr Pain's glowing encouragement that she try a few more strokes - and his insistence that she simply must beat him as hard as she can. 'Maintaining Discipline' is a film with all the rituals of corporal punishment, and all the joy of a spanking for pleasure.
Two words to make any bumfan swoon: yoga pants. Two more: short shorts. This week's scene is not only a hot tease by a lady with a gorgeous bottom, it's a handy visual demonstration of just which clothes best show off a lovely bum. Pandora Blake is off on a date, and she just can't decide what to wear. So, from tight yoga pants to sexy short shorts, she shows you exactly what the options are, and just how nicely they all highlight the full curves of her big butt.
Personally, I'm a fan of yoga pants. No matter what shape your bottom, the tight fabric clings and hugs so well that – in my opinion – it'll look so deliciously spankable that it's pretty hard to resist. Despite the fact that they cover every inch of each buttock, they're so tight they're close to being naked. Obviously, Pandora works this outfit with exactly the style and confidence of someone who knows the appeal of a beautiful big bum.
Tight shorts are to a bottom what dangling jewelry is to a cleavage – they're like a highlighter, pointing right at something beautiful and saying 'look! Appreciate me!' When I'm going up the escalators on the tube, a quick glance up and I never fail to spot one or two bums in tight shorts or trousers that I just want to... Hmm. Smack? Bite? Squeeze?
All of the above.
There's something incredibly satisfying about a lovely big bum. My bum, like the rest of my body, grows and shrinks on a relatively regular annual cycle – getting smaller in the summer when it's too hot to eat much, then getting nice and big and plump just after Christmas when I've gorged myself on roast potatoes. While the title of the video – Does My Bum Look Big in This? is a playful homage to worries about weight and body shape, I love that the video celebrates the sexiness of a deliciously big butt.
There's something very satisfying – and, of course, spankable – about a bottom with full curves. A big bum that you squeeze into a pair of jeans, letting the fabric stretch tight and taut across your buttocks.
I have a pair of short shorts that only come out in winter – partly because I hate having to shave my legs, so I want to wear them with leggings, but partly because in the summer the shorts don't fit quite right. They hang off me a bit, looking deflated and a bit sad. In winter, when I've plumped up a bit, they fit just right – tight and sexy. It's not just the way they look that I like, it's the way that they feel – cupping and hugging me tightly.
In Pandora's video, I'm torn between the tight short shorts as my favourite outfit, or the sexy yoga pants. Of course, there are definitely merits to the sexy tight pink shorts too, and I suspect there'll be some who prefer Pandora's bottom in just a flimsy black lace thong - or kneeling on the sofa with her knickers pulled down and cheeks spread. Whatever your preference, though, I can tell you one thing for sure: if you like big butts, you'll adore this.
There's something I haven't been telling you. Even now, I'm reluctant to talk about it. There are a dozen things I would rather be doing than writing this post, like reading a book, editing a new video for the site, or finishing my half-written blogpost on the latest nonsensical Tory porn block proposal. But it's been over six weeks now, and I really do need to tell you.
In late February, I got a letter from ATVOD.
They addressed it to my legal name and sent it to my business mailbox in central London. I wasn't expecting any mail to that address, so it took over a week for me to pick it up - in fact, it was D (who shares the mailbox) who ended up being the bearer of bad news, bringing it with him when he came to visit one evening.
The letter referenced www.DreamsofSpanking.com and basically said: 'we think you are serving content which we would define as Video on Demand, so please reply and confirm whether you are or not'. The implication being of course, that if I admit I am serving that sort of content, they will claim that I need to register with them and pay them to censor me. The whole thing also says, implied but crystal-clear, We Know Who You Are and We Know Where You Live (or at least where my company is registered).
D thought I was going to be devastated to receive the letter, but when I opened it I just felt numb. I'd known it was coming. It was inevitable. I'm one of the most visible producers in the UK porn scene who is standing up and opposing the new laws. I've been writing blogposts, appearing on TV, distributing free protest videos and generally making a nuisance of myself. They joined my website for 5 days in January, so I already knew they were aware of me. It was only a matter of time before they sent the letter.
I consulted Backlash, followed their advice, and filled out the form and sent it to the return address a couple of weeks later. No point moving things along quicker than necessary. That was mid-March. Backlash advised me to tick yes, Dreams of Spanking allows users to view video content (vague wording, much?) but no, the site does not fall under UK jurisdiction for the purposes of the AudioVisual Media Services Directive. I sent it off.
Since then, I have been under a bit of a shadow. I don't know whether I should tell you this, but it's true, so fuck it: I've gone back on on anti-depressants for the first time in ten years. The depression is situational, and it's a direct result of ATVOD throwing their weight around. I have sunk five years of my life and thousands of pounds in this website - my creativity, my energy, my passion. Anyone who has met me will confirm that the Pandora you see on these pages is not a persona - this is who I am, and what you see is what you get. Dreams of Spanking is the authentic expression of my fantasies, my sexuality, my truest self. To have all of that labour, all of that investment, whisked away...
I feel like I understand, now, why exile from the Roman Empire was considered a fate worse than death. I feel displaced; not geographically, but creatively. The site into which I have invested my labour, my identity, my creative and erotic energy, has become unstable and might be moved from underneath me. I have built my emotional and financial security and my professional and creative career on this project. Now, it is no longer under my control. I might have to take it down; I might lose everything.
To protect myself, involuntarily, I've retreated. I've emotionally disengaged from the day-to-day running of this site, a pre-emptive strike so when they take it away, it won't hurt as much. But who am I kidding. It will still hurt.
So I'm on anti-depressants. I'm talking to a lawyer. When ATVOD issue their Determination, if it is not in my favour, I intend to appeal to Ofcom. Meanwhile, if the updates are a little late sometimes, or if I publish more guest videos than usual, please bear with me. And please don't write helpful suggestions in the comments that I move myself or my basis of operations overseas. Trust me, I've talked every possibility through that you could think of with my lawyer, and I'm choosing the course of action that's best. It's just a shitty situation.
We are living in interesting times. If you haven't yet joined the site, do it now, while you still can - time is running out, and legal fees are expensive.
Last weekend I woke up to some unexpectedly good news - I won a Feminist Porn Award!
Ms Naughty and I were awarded Best BDSM Scene for our collaborative film Instructed! We shot it in Toronto last year - just before the 2014 Feminist Porn Awards, as it happens. A BBC journalist covered the shoot - you can read the resulting article here.
The idea for Instructed was one I'd had several years ago, but it was Ms Naughty and Luke's experrise as cinematographers that turned it from a cute idea into a visually gorgeous short film. Not to mention the unexpectedly intimate contribution of my boyfriend D, who surprised me by sending a real, honest-to-goodness set of dominant instructions for me to read and follow live on camera. He contributed his sexy voice to the voiceover as well.
This is technically a solo film, as I'm the only performer who appears on camera, but Ms Naughty has said in the past that it could equally be described as a couple film, because both D and I are present in the story (D represented by his voice, his words and the object of the letter) and it's all about the trust and intimacy that holds us together, even when we're apart.
Speaking of being apart, it's a bit weird to receive a Feminist Porn Award in absentia. When I attended for the first time last year, I didn't expect to win anything - I just wanted to meet people and soak up the ambience. I was planning to come back in 2015, but what with everything that's been going on over the last few months, travel has been the last thing I've been thinking about.
The moment I found out the Feminist Porn Awards existed, I've daydreamed about winning one. It became a life goal of sorts to raise my production values and ethical standards to the point where I could achieve international recognition from this influential and game-changing feminist porn institution, which is now in its tenth year. That doesn't mean I expected to do so any time soon.
I learned last year that the sort of immersive spanking fantasy film I make doesn't really have a place in the Feminist Porn Awards, which centres consensual, erotic, real-world experiences. I'm also well aware that I'm a self-taught film-maker producing web clips on cheap cameras, doing all my own lighting and editing. I produce a film a week and when I shoot, we can knock out six or seven films a day. Cinematic production values this ain't. There simply isn't time to go to town on each of them, and until I started going to film festivals, I didn't try.
The shoot with Ms Naughty was a bit different. Since we were sharing the content between Dreams of Spanking and Bright Desire, it had to include explicit sexual acts as well as spanking - including a female orgasm. We spent three hours shooting a ten minute short - and it shows. I directed the story and the action, and Ms Naughty directed the videography. It worked well, and I enjoyed working with her - it was a very calm, relaxed set, with all of us focussed on making the best film we could, even if we were shooting off the cuff in an ugly hotel room.
It turned into a genuinely hot study in female kinky sexuality and romantic dominance and submission - and since we released it last year, Instructed has been screened at the Berlin Porn Film Festival 2014, the Pornotopia Film Festival in Albuquerque, and the British Fetish Film Festival and Cinekink NY 2015. I'm absolutely thrilled to add Best BDSM Scene 2015 to its list of successes!
Even in these unhappy times, with independent UK porn beset on all sides by government and financial institutions as well as by fundamentalist feminism, it's wonderful to know that radical, pleasure-centric, woman-centric UK porn is being recognised by the global community. I'm proud to represent my country at the Feminist Porn Awards and show that UK porn can be smart, ethical, and feminist.
Having my work recognised by the international feminist porn community has been an ambition of mine since I first began. Even if ATVOD succeed in getting Dreams of Spanking shut down, we'll end on a high note.
Ms Naughty has written a blogpost about the awards - her site Bright Desire also won a coveted Honoured Website award, which was well deserved. Ms Naughty also live-blogged the live stream of the awards ceremony. Here's the full list of winners:
Sexiest Short Wall of Fire - Lisa Ganser and Pachisi - The Madame
Smutty School Teacher Award for Sex Education Jessica Drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: Plus Size - Jessica Drake and Kelly Shibari
Sexiest Star Feature JL + DD: Jiz Lee and Danni Daniels - Jiz Lee and Danni Daniels
Most Tantalizing Trans Film BIODILDO 2.0 - Christian Slaughter
Hottest Newcomer Evie Eliot
Hottest Kink Film Love Hard - Gala Vanting
Heartthrob of the Year Morgana Muses
Golden Beaver Award for Canadian Content Queen Bee Empire - Samuel Shanahoy
Hottest Trans Vignette Trans Lesbians - Courtney Trouble
Hottest Straight Vignette Xconfessions Vol. 2 - Erika Lust
Steamiest Straight Movie The Sexual Liberation of Anna Lee - Jacky St. James
Hottest Lesbian Vignette Lesbian Curves 3: Soft Girls and Strap Ons - Courtney Trouble
Most Dazzling Docu-Porn Bound By Borders - Tobi-Hill Meyer
Best Direction Pulsion - Ovidie
Best Boygasm Heavenly Spire Volume 1 - Shine Louise Houston
Best BDSM Scene Instructed - Pandora Blake and Ms. Naughty
Movie of the Year Marriage 2.0 - Paul Deeb
Alias and Knives - John Bee
Homance - Ajapop Films, Maxine Holloway, and Siouxsie Q
Fuck Dolls - Zahra Stardust and Emerald
Hello Titty - Skyler Braeden Fox and Idan Sagiv Richter
Maintaining Discipline – our new flirty two-part switch storyline starring Pandora Blake and Mike Pain – is like a Who's Who (or What's What) of corporal punishment instruments. The pair work their way through the slipper to tawse and cane, with a bit of warm-up hand spanking thrown in when they switch roles. Because of this, I thought it'd be a good excuse to take a closer look at some of our favourite implements.
Most blog posts I write for Dreams of Spanking are written from my point of view as an enthusiastic, horny sex blogger, eager to tell you all the ways in which individual scenes float my kinky boat. This time, though, I'm going to pretend to be Amazon – providing recommendations for further viewing depending on which implement you prefer. So grab a membership if you don't have one already, and settle down for some personalised film recommendations...
In part one of Maintaining Discipline, new teacher Ms Blake is given instruction in corporal punishment by the friendly headmaster. He wants to make sure she can keep her pupils under control, and what better way than with the stinging whack of the slipper on a bare bottom? The headmaster makes an unexpected offer - and bends over so Pandora can learn to dish it out.
In Maintaining Discipline part 2, though, it's her turn to understand how it feels - a clearly aroused Ms Blake offers up her bottom, and the headmaster shows her just how much corporal punishment can hurt.
If you like the slipper, you might also like: Sent to the Headmistress. Cute delinquent schoolboy David Weston is hauled in front of the stern headmistress, and bends over her desk for a spanking.
You might also like one of my personal favourites. Pandora tells me that it's rare to see male/female switching films in spanking porn, so if you love M/F switch scenes as much as you love the slipper, I bet you'll enjoy The Schoolgirl's Revenge. Grown-up schoolgirl Molly Malone cunningly turns the tables on her old headmaster Sir John Beecroft, in a twisted tale of blackmail and revenge.
Wooden rulers are a special kind of implement. While many spanking tools are made specifically for the job, the wooden ruler is something that might be found lying around any classroom or study, and happen to be conveniently to hand when the time comes to dish out punishment. In Maintaining Discipline part 1, Pandora tries out both slow, hard strokes and a quick flurry of six cracks in a row.
If you like the ruler, you might also like: Dana for Senator. Dana Kane's Senatorial campaign starts soon, and her interns Michael Darling and Pandora Blake need to shape up. So Dana makes use of the wooden ruler that lies so temptingly on her desk nearby...
Leather straps and tawses have always been a favourite of mine. In Maintaining Discipline part 2, a calm Mike Pain explains to Pandora that the tawse hurts more because of the split in the centre of the leather, before advising her to use it "as hard as she can". It certainly has an impact – ear-splitting cracks followed by tell-tale red stripes that instantly appear on Mike's bottom.
If you like the tawse, you might also like: The Prefect and the Fag. One of my favourite ever Dreams of Spanking films, because it contains two guys who just happen to be the kind of people I'd blush at if I met them in a bar - plus some twisted abuses of power and an intensely hot tawsing at the end.
It's also well worth checking out Alex Reynolds and Paul Kennedy in Playing Truant – a more vicious tawsing on the tender skin at the back of the thighs, in which both performers pull off a spectacular translation of fantasy into reality.
In case it wasn't obvious, the cane is one of the most popular things on Dreams of Spanking – I'm sure you can guess why. In Maintaining Discipline part 2, part of Pandora Blake's tutorial involves learning how to use the cane. With headmaster Mike Pain bent over the desk, providing calm instructions, she starts first with a thin cane and then onto much harder strokes with a thick one. Which is more painful? I'll let you decide...
If you like the cane, you might also like: There are plenty of scenes to choose from here, and I'm struggling to pick just one or two. What I will say is that if you love the cane, you're in for a real treat, because we've been on a bit of a caning spree recently, as so many amazing people joined in with our sponsored caning protest against the UK porn laws - such as bondage superstar Ariel Anderssen.
And, of course, if you enjoyed watching Pandora cane Mike in Maintaining Discipline part 2, you definitely shouldn't miss Mike Pain's spectacular début thrashing on Dreams of Spanking – Mike's Secret - which might just the hardest caning Pandora has given on film to date.
So what do you think? Were we right - if you like the slipper, ruler, tawse and cane, did you enjoy our recommendations? Or do you have other favourites?