I'd put a casting call up on my blog, but disappointingly, my inbox was not instantly flooded with requests for work from bright young things willing to shoot M/M spanking scenes. I received lots of emails from willing chaps over 40 who wanted to bottom to women, but lovely as I'm sure they were, none of them was really suitable for the scenes I had in mind.
In the end it was Twitter that solved my problem. I posted to the effect that I was looking for kinky young men willing to bottom on camera for CP films, and that I was offering competitive rates of pay, creative input and good times. Someone on my feed put me in touch with a friend of theirs. He didn't have a website, but he did have a link to a fetlife profile. I took one look at his photo gallery and was sold.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to Dreams of Spanking's newest star, Sebastian Hawley:
Sebastian switches, but was mostly interested in new encounters as a bottom, and had experience at modelling and acting. He's into deep D/S and service. Plus, look at that beautiful inkwork. I had to shoot him. All I needed now was someone to top.
My close friend Jimmy Holloway was my first male bottom, and since he's happy working with blokes I was originally looking for an open-minded male top to work with him. Sadly, however, he's not been available to bottom on film for most of the last couple of years, although he's been an absolute star behind the scenes and has done a lot of my camera work. And male tops willing to work with men have been few and far between. I've found a couple of straight male tops who would be happy doing it in a purely acting sort of way, but for sizzling screen chemistry (although none of my scenes are sexual - I like to put boys in restrained discipline scenarios) I ideally wanted to cast male performers who liked men.
So when Jimmy mentioned that he'd been enjoying exploring his switch side in private and would be interested in topping for me on film, I was overjoyed. And instantly desperate to see him and Sebastian together. Two handsome young men. Both a bit alternative. Both into power exchange. Both bisexual. It was literally a dream come true.
I invited both of them to contribute scene ideas, and between us we came up with several we could use. In the end, I decided to shoot two M/M scenes on the day, and wrap up with an F/MM scene with me topping both of them. I was a bit nervous about the topping part, but super keen to see a schoolroom scene with two boys which was as humane, sensitive and engaging as some of the schoolroom scenes in which girls share punishments together.
The first scene was taken out of the book of my ultimate fantasy scenarios. A downtrodden young fag at a public school, and the bullying prefect who has the right to his labour. I think this scene borrows heavily from reading Roald Dahl's Boy at a young age. I have an image of the prefect wiping the mantelpiece with a white gloved finger while young Roald quakes in his shoes.
I didn't have the costume budget for the full Eton top hat and tails (that's one for further down the line), so my public school was a modern one. Hard to be historical when one of your actors has long hair, the other has large plug piercings and both have tattoos, anyway - the ink can be covered with long-sleeved uniforms but the rest is hard to hide.
(I'd had a great time ordering uniform for the boys off the internet, feeling like a proper pornographer as I asked their sizes and selected colours for them - matching maroon jumpers, blue long sleeved shirts, stripy red and black ties. Jimmy didn't own any grey trousers so I got him a pair of those too, which fitted so well that he declared them to be his new favourite going-out trousers. There's something fantastically decadent about purchasing kinky outfits for other people to wear. The uniforms are still folded neatly in my room and I get a mini-thrill whenever I look at them.)
We started out taking some portrait shots of Sebastian, showing off his beautiful celtic inkwork and getting him into some spanking-themed solo poses with his favourite heavy wooden paddle. Tricia Sullivan (who also took the beautiful introductory shots of Jimmy), one of my favourite female gaze photographers, was behind the camera, and I was directing - always a pleasure when I'm not having to perform at the same time. It was particularly lovely being able to direct a new spanking model with the benefit of all my experience - to be able to say "this will feel really unnatural, but it'll look great" and so on, with an empathy for the disjunction that often exists between what feels right and what looks right.
My fun behind the camera continued with the first M/M scene - the prefect and the fag, for which I was handling the video camera as well as directing.
I hadn't seen Jimmy top before, and I was instantly taken aback by his poise. His dialogue and pacing was perfect, and he struck the ideal balance between scary in-scene and reassuring and friendly out-of-scene.
I knew Sebastian didn't have much CP experience, so I'd written most of the scenes to be short and punchy, and we started with some hand spanking over his boxers to get him warmed up. His restrained hisses and gasps as he processed the sensations were absolutely delightful to watch from my point of view, and when his boxers came down he'd turned a lovely shade of cherry red.
Knowing how much he enjoyed service kink, I'd written some boot-blacking into the scene. Watching Sebastian at work was quite amazing: his focus and perfectionism created a crackling energy when set against Jimmy's performance as (in his own words) a "wonderful cunt".
For the next scene, I had them dressed in traditional upper class hunting outfit, breeks, moleskins, v-necked jumpers and all, playing well-to-do young men acting out the unfortunate consequences of a drunken wager. (Because all spanking scenarios are improved by class dynamics, obviously.) This was a tricky scene to roleplay, but the result was unexpectedly hilarious. Sebastian took twelve with the riding crop over his boxers, and Jimmy didn't mess about - he had some fantastic marks afterwards, which we captured in stills although they weren't shown off in the (terribly straight) video.
Finally, we played a schoolroom scene with me as the teacher and the boys as star pupils in my ethics and philosophy class. I wanted to write them a scene where they were in the right, despite being the bottoms - where they were punished for doing something interesting and honourable, in the sort of school scene which I myself like playing. So I was their young, slightly anxious form teacher, and they had cleverly sabotaged the school's new intrusive CCTV system as an act of non-violent protest. Sadly, the school's attitude to such vandalism was exactly the opposite of non-violent.
The tension in this scene was lovely, just lovely: they both looked beautifully young in their oversized jumpers; Jimmy made an obnoxiously fluent know-it-all teenager; and having someone to roleplay alongside gave Sebastian a new confidence with the improvisation. Despite being the top, I'd written myself a losing proposition - I wasn't going to win the argument, and my only recourse was institutional, rather than moral, authority.
Still, I got to give six memorable stripes to each of two lovely bottoms, which I admit I enjoyed rather more than I should have. The boys told me afterwards that they didn't mind too much, either.
So: two M/M scenes, one F/MM; a new confidence in topping for Jimmy and me; cute boys looking adorable in school uniform; an all-female crew and overall, one of the most stress-free shoots I've ever been on. Being behind the camera really is a completely different experience when you aren't also having to be in front of it; and not bottoming at all was surprisingly liberating.
Subbing on camera is still my primary interest, and I have no intentions of giving it up. But when I can find actors this hot to execute my ideas this well, there is a new and different pleasure in producing films which focus on others - especially if those others are male.